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Sing-a-long-a BT Protest Song






Okay, pick a well-known tune – I’d say 'Don’t think twice, it’s all right' would be a good one - and share my pain by joining me in a karaoke protest to BT. Deep breath and here we go:-

Well, it ain’t no use me staring at my Home Hub
at lights that wink and flash.
And it ain’t no use me calling up BT ‘cos
they only want me for my cash.
When I tell them there’s a problem with their outside line,
they read their scripts and tell me everything’s just fine.
But when a hard rain falls it happens every time.
Listen twice, please, I’m right!

So, after many, many hours of my precious time being wasted trying to impress on a distant call centre that it doesn’t matter how many times I switch my router on and off, the outside line (as we know from last year) is f*cked, they finally agree that the problem requires a real live engineer. Hoo-berludy-ray!

The engineer arrives, (truly, I’m grateful) runs a test, fits an Okey-Cokey 2009 which he says will make the whole system run more efficiently and everything goes into meltdown, including his laptop. He tweaks a few more wires, runs another test and picks up what he feels is a blip some 300 yards away. Ah, that would be the same blip, the same junction box that the previous engineer picked up last year. The one that fills with water whenever we get torrential rain...

Image is 'Wales - Coast' by Tom Tomos
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Comments

Maggie Christie said…
Argh how frustrating! We had this too with endless visits from BT. It got to be quite a pain, I'd come home and there'd be a BT van at the bottom of the driveway, BT bloke up pole, tinkering. Phone would be off, then on, off again etc. Once I arrived home to find THREE vans and SEVEN engineers. Finally one made his way all the way up the drive (brave soul). Did a bit of testing, changed the box on the outside of the house (full of water perhaps?) and the line. Bingo. It is fixed (touch wood). I hope yours is soon too. Why do they make us suffer so?
21 May 2009 at 05:29
Irish Eyes said…
Based on personal experience here, you should be due 6 million visits, with matching shimmying up poles, a zillion blips and more flood based hassle than you can shake a stick at, before it occurs to them to really do something...
Condolences to you and good luck, one day soon a beep may hit their tester-people in the fresh ideas department and you will be hassle free.

Off to say a novena for your deliverance now!
21 May 2009 at 05:53
Flowerpot said…
I love the painting, but can empathise with BT problems. Doesn't it drive you NUTS?????!!
21 May 2009 at 06:58
Milla said…
oh this sounds like when we moved house and told T Mobile that we could no longer get coverage. Yes you can, they said, it says so in our system. This was meant to have more weight than the inconvenient fact that we didn't get coverage with them. Maddening. Have courage, and a big glass of wine.
21 May 2009 at 07:05
Pondside said…
Good luck, Chris! I have the feeling that you will really get to know many an engineer as you try to get this solved - will get to know their family stories and perhaps be invited to family christenings and weddings.
21 May 2009 at 07:20
Chris Stovell said…
Mags, you'll be pleased to know there's a 'pot' of 20 of them for this area... if all 20 turn up at once, we're in trouble!

Irish Eyes, welcome... and thanks, I think!!

FP, 'Nuts' is quite mild for the way I felt yesterday. Totally f*cking livid is a tad more accurate!

Milla, ah yes, The System - who cares what the customer says anymore (reaching for another bottle).

Pondside...nooooooooooo!
21 May 2009 at 11:53
Jenny Beattie said…
Oh dear god.

I turned the air blue with my language yesterday when after a huge storm, I couldn't get internet... AGAIN.

The swearing seemed to do the trick though. I got back on fairly quickly.
21 May 2009 at 23:01
Deborah Carr (Debs) said…
So damn frustrating. My system has been playing up a bit, but at least it doesn't go haywire every time it pours with rain.
22 May 2009 at 00:05
Exmoorjane said…
Can't even let myself read this too carefully as can feel blood pressure starting to rise at just the title.... I have cried down the phone with frustration at a BT person.... and all that 'well, if it were this bit of wire, it would be up to us, but as it is THIS bit of wire, it's not our problem.'
just AAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
22 May 2009 at 06:35
Tattieweasle said…
It makes you weep! All I can say is keep shouting unless you can get it through the ether like me - gave up on BT and very glad I did so.
Will cross fingers that they pul theirs out for you...
22 May 2009 at 07:17
Tamsyn Murray said…
I'm feeling your pain. Mind you, it doesn't rain that often where you live, does it??
23 May 2009 at 01:36
Chris Stovell said…
JJ, if swearing was the answer my broadband speed would be truly impressive!

Debs, it seems no one can say they've got a reliable system.

Jane, I'm sure it can't be good for anyone to get that upset - I was shaking with rage... had to hand the phone to Tom for a while to calm down!

Tattie, thank you... I just don't know who else to turn to out here!

Tam, true! Good job we live in such a dry, warm area :) !
23 May 2009 at 03:33
Brown Dog said…
Oh, Chris - I feel your pain! Almost EXACTLY the same scenario here a couple of years ago when, try as I might, I just couldn't get them to send a real live engineer over without going through Ranjid in Bangalore who kept asking me over and over again whether I'd tried plugging and unplugging my set (er - yes - about 500 times...)Grrrrrr! And when the engineer DID finally arrive, several phone years later, it was exactly the same - water in our junction box. (Don't wish to depress you, but our broadband is often still a bit dodgy when it rains. Not really ideal in west Britain, is it?)

Love the way you're working those Bob Dylan lyrics, by the way - they're so versatile aren't they? That's the thing about a long career covering 33 albums - there's a line there for almost every occasion.

Adore that painting, too. Would love to know where we can see Tom's work in the flesh...
24 May 2009 at 04:10
Chris Stovell said…
Brown Dog, I humbly accept the compliment from the maestro of Bob lyrics reworked. And go off to cry in the corner at the bad news about the sodden junction box!
24 May 2009 at 14:37
Westerwitch/Headmistress said…
Deep Deep breathe - and here's my chainsaw . . . see Kitty in the Coomon Room today - BT have cut her off for a week, or more whilst they are re-newing her contract. Any other business behaved the way BT does to their customers and they would be going to the wall.
26 May 2009 at 03:54
Calico Kate said…
You are not alone ..... my M&D are having the most awful problems (and service) with BT which has been going for for yearS now.
Good luck!
CKx
26 May 2009 at 04:51
Chris Stovell said…
WW and Kate... shall we have a chainsaw accompaniement to go with the song? And would your M&D like to join in too, Kate? Good! Here we go.....
26 May 2009 at 07:41
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