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Stuck In A Moment


Tuesday 5 June: Leaving It Behind
It’s all right everyone, you can look again. The grief fest is over for another year so it’s time to draw a line under that for now and try to move on. Except I’m feeling a bit stuck after an unexpected attack from one of my visitors this week.

Now, gather round because I’m about to tell you a secret. Come right in, that’s it. Do you see that woman on the right? Yes her, piggy eyes and dodgy hair. Well, I’m afraid that’s not the real me. The thing is, if I posted a photo of what I actually looked like there’d be fly-buttons popping all over cyberspace and Suffolkmum would look, well frankly, rather ordinary.

Hmn. I can see that you’re not convinced. Hang on a minute whilst I adjust my slinky pencil skirt and make myself comfortable. Ah, that’s better! Oh wait, I’ll just kick off my very high and very pointy stiletto shoes too. These buttons will have to be done-up even if it means that no one gets the dubious benefit of my fake leopard-skin push-up bra.

Nope, it’s not fooling anyone, is it? All right, hands up, the middle-aged mumsy person over there is me, happily minding my own business and trying not to rub anyone up the wrong way. However, I now gather, from a telling conversation raised when everyone else was safely out of earshot, that I am something of a femme fatale who single-handedly destroyed two marriages thirteen years ago. My response, rather measured in the circumstances I thought, was to advise walking in my shoes before making a judgement on my morals and principles.

I’ve tried to shrug it off because the people involved know what really happened then so there’s no need for me to tell my story here. Everyone came out the other side; the adults are all happily remarried, the children grew up to be high-achievers making their way successfully in the world. And thankfully the most important people to me in this equation, my lovely daughters, don’t think I’m an evil person. As Lily said to me when she heard how upset I was, ‘We were there, Mum, and we know that’s not true.’

Wednesday 6 June: Hair Today
Ho hum. On a more frivolous note, it’s hair decision time again. The longer and wavier my hair gets the more Tom loves it and the more I hate it. I don’t even recognise myself anymore because I’m morphing into Brian May. I’ve been going along with Tom because I’ve been telling myself I’ll do something with my hair once I get a decision on my book. But at this rate I’ll look like one of those folks who periodically appear after being lost in the jungle for years. I’ll probably have the beard as well. Oh well, at least the men in the village will be safe.

Hwyl fawr!
The painting is 'Cathedral Interior' by Tom Tomos.

Comments

Pipany said…
Hello Chris. Finally done a huge catch up and am up to date I think. So, I blog in the company of a femme fatale, eh? Jolly good. Having been the recipient of such ludicrous and inappropriate comments myself in the past I can only say ARSE to the small-minded twits who say such things and clearly have no knowledge of what they are talking about. By the way, you do look very pretty in your piccy! xx
oh know about this too Chris. Are you sure you are not my doppelganger? I regard the existence of my well balanced and lovely children and step children, all getting along with each other, me,Ian and their other parents as an evidence of getting something right. dont let it get to you. v nice pic by the way.
Ditto Pipany ChrisH!

You look lovely and try and take no notice of the barbed comments! But I know I would too, it is awful when people make unfair comments or judgments and especially when they don't know the full circumstances!
All I can say that is your kids are now old enough to know that whatever happened, it was the best thing for all of you for them to have 2 happy parents. And they sound like they have come to terms with it all and haven't got a problem, so sod what outsiders think!
Sometimes S**T happens. But you only get one life...

You enjoy it m'dear, with your lovely family.

warm wishes
xx
Un Peu Loufoque said…
EEHHH you take no notice pet if you heard the things people have said about me in the past your ears would drop off. Stick to the moral high ground the view is better up there and ignore nasty comments you know the truth!

Ps if that is you looking mumsy and middel aged then I look like a geriatric ragbag...
Rose1278 said…
Yes, dont listen to the horrible comments! We were there and we know what the situation was! I can feel a severe wart-hogging on my part coming on! hehe muchos love xxxxx
Frances said…
Hello Chris,
I popped over here to thank you for your comments (with which I absolutely agree.)

Now I want to read all your blogs, but right absolutely now, I have to get myself together to get to the shop.

I will be back to visit soon.
Cait O'Connor said…
I was a femme fatale in a past life but we all get along great now.
Both pics are just lovely.
Caitx
Suffolkmum said…
I quite fancy being a femme fatale. Joking aside, I know how incredibly frustrating and infuriating it is when people weigh in about situations they have no idea about. Sounds like you had your priorities right then and now. You look great in your pic - all I can say is, I hope none of you ever meet me in real life - I AM very ordinary!
Woozle1967 said…
Hi Chris, beautiful AND a talented writer - no wonder they want to put you down! Jealousy usually comes out in barbed words to destroy your confidence, so toss those wavy locks (before you cut them off?) and let narrow minded, ill-informed twits get on with it.xx
Maggie Christie said…
This was a visitor who made the unexpected attack? I hope you spat in his/her tea! Ditto to Woozle's comments.
Pondside said…
Hi Chris
1) That's a perfectly fine picture of a very attractive woman
2) I think that when people say mean things about you that they are revealing more about themselves than about you.
3) You are a very good writer, from evidence on this blog site
4)If you want a fake leopard bra, just treat yourself to it girl!!!
Pipany said…
Me again, Chris. Just wanted to thank you for the lovely comments you left on my Wed blog. Feeling determined, stronger and more like me now! xx
Chris Stovell said…
Thank you everyone for making me feel better about myself. Being criticised by someone who knew nothing about me and who was basing her observations on second hand information reopened old wounds. I felt very down and critical of myself. Truly, you have really helped me to overcome these doubts. Thank you all of you.
countrymousie said…
Finally catching up also.
Been there, done that, got the husband. Yep, I too have, accordingly to legend, led rather a "hot" life. Some 23 years ago I became a 3rd wife - he was my first husband - but the scandal. All done and dusted - but, perhaps not!! Perhaps they are still talking - oh I do hope so.
My mum will have been gone some 2 years on the 18th of June - this year has seemed far harder than last for some reason. She caught MRSA in hospital and died from it.
My thoughts are with you now. love mousie
Sally Townsend said…
Hey I'm right behind you too Chris, someone had a low swipe at me on 'another' site. Easy when she was hiding behind a false name but being the lady I am I simply ignored her and left her to look rather pitiful. Sally xx
Exmoorjane said…
Just catching up too - so sorry you had this happen....it's hurtful and horrible even when it is not true... I would have been devastated. I think Pipany has it right actually - ARSE indeed.

Jealousy indeed too.....
Inthemud said…
Just been catching up on your blogs, Your dad was such a handsome man.
My uncle currently is battleing with the same cancer, absolutely dreadful.
I know the Princess Alice Hospice well, used to be just down the road from there.
Re: this blog:
As you say only you know the whole story and it's not right to spread aspersions.
You look pretty good to me.
Pondside said…
Hi again , Chris. I just thought I'd drop by to say that I hope your week got better! This is just my way of having a virtual cup of tea with you. Have a good weekend, now that you have your house back to yourself.
well with the things that have been said about me I think I should get the red light out and start a price list....take no notice...who actually cares?
Thanks for the comments on my blogs
CAMILLA said…
Hello Chris,
Apologies, just catching up with your blogs, thank you for leaving messages on mine. Your photo shows a very attractive woman, and you are a talented writer. How horrid that you have had such rude comments said about you, dont it let it worry you, it is them that has a problem.
Camilla.xx
Posie said…
Your blog made me smile, good to catch up and you look terrific in your pic. Life is a funny old twisty winding path, and people who think it is a straight forward ride must be very naive, crappy comments, take no notice.

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